1. My Inner/Outer Labia don’t look normal to me? Is there something wrong with my lady-parts down there?

No. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you whether you think your inner or outer labia look different from normal. This is because there really isn’t a “normal” definition of what labia are supposed to look like. There is often variety in the shape and size of inner and outer labia because of the genetic differences between all of us. In general, inner labia (labia minora) can be anywhere from 3/4^th inch-2 inches long and can very easily stick out above the outer labia (labia majora), there is absolutely nothing abnormal about it. The labia also may change in color, shape and size throughout your lifetime because of puberty, age and hormonal differences. The labia may also change in color, shape or size during sexual arousal, as blood flow increases to them. I can promise you ladies that your bits are perfectly normal if they are visible in all postures, some postures or aren’t visible at all. All women are unique and that makes them beautiful! So it’s time for all you lady followers to realize you are perfectly normal and your lady-parts are beautiful just the way they are. It’s time to stop hatin’ on your labia and yourself and think of them as a unique piece of artwork that no one else in the world has! Labioplasty (the cosmetic mutilation of the labia) should NEVER be considered unless directed by a health-care professional for serious problems such as your labia are blocking the flow of menstrual blood and urine from being excreted. I also heard a horror-story of a girl who tried to trim her labia herself with a scissors! Ladies pleaseeeee don’t EVER do that. The medical consequences of such an act could be very severe. The vulva is very vascular, if you were to do that it’s very possible that you could bleed out and be dead before you even knew what hit you. If you would like more information on labia variety, there is a fabulous article that I came across on Scartleteen.com, here is the link: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/giveem_some_lip_labia_that_clearly_aint_minor

Also to give you an idea of just how much variety the labia can have, I am also posting the link to Betty Dodson’s beautiful illustrations for your viewing enjoyment. Please take a look ladies before you start questioning whether your labia are normal or not! http://www.scarleteen.com/resource/advice/betty_dodsons_vulva_illustrations

Vagina’s 101: Is my Vagina too tight or too loose? What If I’m too wet or not wet enough for sex?

Alright ladies, it’s time to put to rest the myth of the “loose-girl”. The first and foremost thing every girl should know about her vagina is that it is a MUSCLE and muscles do not change size permanently. The vagina is designed to stretch to fit any shape or size of the penis, it is also designed to obviously be able to push a baby out through it. Your vagina CANNOT become loose by having sex! It will stretch during sexual arousal to accommodate the “penis” (penis in parentheses because that is not the only type of penetration obviously, but it is the most common), and then will return to it’s normal shape and size after intercourse. The ONLY way the vagina may actually become “looser” is after the woman has had a child. So ladies, the next time your boyfriend/girlfriend/whatever tells you that you “feel different,” unless you’ve had a kid recently, you can tell them they are full of shit. On the other side of this, women often complain that their vagina is too tight to have sex comfortably. There may be several reasons for this. The first being that the woman may still have her hymen in-tact. If the hymen is in-tact, it puts a thin membrane over the entrance to the vagina, making it difficult for penetration of any kind, and thus giving the feeling of “tightness”. The obvious remedy for this is to break the hymen either by yourself, with a partner or you can even have your gynecologist do it for you. There are also two other conditions that may cause apparent vaginal tightness, these are Vaginismus and Dyspareunia. Vaginismus is where the muscles around the outer third of the vagina contract involuntarily making penetration of any kind almost impossible and painful. Dyspareunia simply means “painful intercourse” and can happen before, during or after intercourse. Both of these conditions are classified as sexual disorders and can be treated by a medical professional or sex therapist. The most common remedy for both of these conditions is a combination of psychotherapy and “vaginal dilator therapy” which is where a woman gets a set of cylindrical objects similar-looking to tampons in a range of sizes and uses them to slowly stretch the vagina. Note: These should only be used under the direction of a medical professional or therapist, do not try this alone! For your enjoyment, I am attaching a diagram of the vulva for those of you who need a little refresher of the external reproductive system of women:

On to the matter of vaginal “wetness”. Vaginal wetness is caused by the natural lubrication the vagina produces to make sex more comfortable. Natural lubrication is essential for pain-free sex since it is designed to make penetration easier and can increase your vaginal sensitivity, which helps produce orgasm! If you are either too wet or not wet enough, there may be a few things causing this. If you have recently started using birth control or have recently switched brands, the fluctuations of estrogen and progesterone may be the cause. Also, certain medications may have vaginal dryness as a side-effect such as certain antidepressants and high blood pressure medications. Also, depending on the time of the month that you may have sex, that could dictate how wet you get. Usually women notice that they produce more lubrication during the time of the month that they are ovulating. Being wet is nothing to worry about! In fact, it’s something to celebrate because it’s usually the cause of being hyper-aroused, meaning your partner did a good job! If you feel you are so wet that your partner’s penis slips out of you, try suggesting the use of condoms as this helps with friction. Also, trying different brands and kinds of textured condoms may help as well. If you feel you are not wet enough for sex, I cant stress this enough, LUBE LUBE LUBE! That will make sex a lot more enjoyable for both partners. If you’re using the lubricant with a condom, remember to use water-based lube, since silicone-based can break down the latex in condoms and cause them to not be effective.

2. Is my pubic hair growth normal? To Shave or not to shave? What’s the deal with waxing?

Ahhhh, pubic hair. The little annoying hairs that grow out if your genitals. First of all, it’s perfectly normal no matter what your pubic hair looks like. Some people have a lot of hair, others don’t. Some people have carpet that don’t match the curtains, that’s fine too! Some people’s pubic hair strictly grows out of their genital region, others have pubic hair that extends above the waistline. Everyone is different, because everyone’s genetics and hormones are different. Another big misconception I think people have, especially girls, is that their partner will think it’s weird if they have hair in certain areas. For example, girls may be self-conscious and shave their butts or arms, but the biggest thing about that, and shaving in general is that once you start you can never go back. Hair growth is an interesting thing because after you shave once and let the hair grow back in, it will grow in thicker than it was before and may even be more painful as it grows in. For example, you may notice you get a lot more ingrown hairs or that the hair may be sharp and stab you in unwanted places. Needless to say, if you’re going to go the route of shaving, you have to keep up with it regardless of where on your body you’re going to be shaving! As far as the best ways to prevent from getting razor-burn, the best advice I’ve found stems from a website called www.razor-burn.com. I suggest you all take a look at it, if you’re concerned with that. Now onto the debates: to shave or not to shave? That’s all a personal preference. Some people like to shave everything, some people prefer the total “natural” look and choose not to shave at all, some people like to keep things trimmed, and some people like to trim their pubic hair into shapes such as “The Landing Strip” and the “Bermuda Triangle”. Ultimately, there is no “right” way to go about it. Shave if you feel like you want to, or don’t if you so choose. What about shaving vs. waxing? That, once again is a personal preference. Obviously waxing is a helluva lot more painful. But shaving requires a lot more maintenance. Waxing can be done every few weeks, but shaving usually needs to be done everyday to keep things sleek and clean. It all depends on your skin’s sensitivity and your pain tolerance and of course your financial situation also-it’s a lot cheaper to shave than it is to wax. But like I said, to each their own.

3. Birth Control 101

This topic is one that is going to be hard to cover in an FAQ page I’m afraid, but I get a lot of questions on different forms of birth control, where to get them, how to use them, how effective are they, etc. So what I originally did was make an awesome table for you guys of all the different methods, but it wouldn’t load properly to tumblr. ): SO. Change of Plans. I found a great chart on www.healthystartcoalition.org that offers pretty much all the same info I was going to give you guys, so I’m posting that for you to go over the basics. If you still have questions such as what brand of pill/condom is right for me, or how do I obtain birth control if I’m under 18 and don’t want my parents to know, etc. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don’t hesitate to ask me! I’m involved with all sorts of safer sex organizations and am very knowledgeable about contraceptives and would be happy to answer any questions you guys have that cannot be answered in this preliminary information I’m providing you with. (:

4. Masturbation: How-To’s, Where-To’s and What-To-Use For Ladies & Gents!.

Let’s start with my lady-followers because this seems to be the most common type of question I get and also the most taboo form of masturbation. First of all, YES YOU’RE NORMAL AND YES IT’S PERFECTLY OKAY TO MASTURBATE! Masturbation is awesome.There is not better way for you to learn about your body and what you like and to be able to then tell your partner what you like than some self-love! Masturbation is also good for strengthening your pelvic floor muscles, revitalizing body tissues, fighting insomnia, reducing depression, relieving menstrual cramps, and releasing emotional tension and stress. Here’s some awesome statistics for you too, ladies: while 95% of men masturbate, still 85% of women also do! See, there’s nothing abnormal about it. There are many different ways for girls to masturbate. The most important thing is to just do some exploration and decide what feels good to you. You can do two types of masturbating; vaginal and clitoral. Vaginal refers to inserting something into the vagina and is internal, whereas clitoral refers to stimulating the clitoris and is external. You can masturbate by inserting “Taylorann-Approved” objects into your vagina, by using your hands, by rubbing up against pillows or stuffed animals, by humping furniture, with a showerhead or bathtub faucet, or by putting vibrating objects against your clitoris or in your vagina. There are many more ways to masturbate I’m sure, just be creative and explore! To get the most out of your masturbating experience I suggest finding a nice, quiet place where you wont be disturbed such as a bedroom or bathroom. I would also suggest, if it’s your first time, to really focus on getting yourself in the mood; light some candles, put on some soft music, put on comfortable or silky clothing or put lavender or vanilla scented lotion on your naked body. Also, it doesn’t hurt to look at or think about some erotic material to get you in the mood. You can fantasize, envision a person you would like to have sex with and imagine them pleasuring you, look at porn, erotic magazines, read erotic books, stories or poems, look at erotic imagery…anything really to stimulate your mind while you stimulate your body! Now for some things to use if you choose to masturbate vaginally that are “Taylorann Approved” (: Vibrators are an excellent option and you can get them made of silicone or plastic (NOTE: be aware of certain jelly-rubber toys because they may contain potentially harmful levels of phthalates-chemicals that have been linked to many health problems and can easily enter the body if leaked out of a toy). Vibrators also come in a variety of shapes, sizes, colors, vibration levels, and volume levels. Do some research to find out the right one for you. You can also use dildos, which are non-vibrating toys that can be inserted into the vagina. These can be made out of silicone, rubber, even glass! Dildos also come in a variety of shapes, sizes, colors, and textures. Other things you can use to masturbate are your cell phone (on vibrate of course!), personal massagers, a cucumber (peeled, thoroughly washed, and covered in lube-DON’T EAT IT WHEN YOU’RE DONE!), a hairbrush handle covered in lube or even a curling iron (not turned on, inserting the tip-covered in lube). Things to avoid are anything sharp, carrots, and candles as these can scratch the vagina, break off in the vagina, or even get lost in the vagina! NOT GOOD.

Let’s move on to my male-followers now. Masturbation is also perfectly normal, okay and wonderful for men. Masturbation also has the same benefits for men as it does for women: it strengthens pelvic floor muscles, revitalizes body tissues, fights insomnia, reduces depression and releases emotional tension and stress. An added benefit strictly for men is that masturbation that results in ejaculation also releases prostate fluid, helping to prevent prostate infections. Masturbation also teaches control and arousal for men and can help greatly in preventing premature ejaculation and helping you to last longer in partner-sex! Many men wonder about this question: should I use lube? The answer is that it’s a matter of personal preference. Some men like the slickness and others prefer to go the dry route. That’s really up to you if you want to try it out. If you decide you want to try using lube, here are some things you can use as lubricant: water-based or silicone-based lubricant of course, saliva (you’ll need a lot of it though!), hand lotion, conditioner, massage oil, and masturbation creams specifically formulated for men. Things to AVOID as lubricant: soap and shampoo. They can dry out the skin on your penis resulting in itching, cracking, peeling, and chaffing. Also, if they happen to enter your urethra (the pee hole), they can sting a lot. YIKES. Erotic mind stimulation may also be very helpful for men when masturbating. Feel free to look at porn, erotic magazines, pictures, watch erotic movies, fantasize, even reading erotic books or stories. Visual stimulation is just as good for men as it is for women. Men can masturbate manually (with hand stimulation) or by the use of toys designed specifically for men to feel like a woman’s mouth, vagina or anus. Some different kinds of sex toys for men include: masturbation sleeves (i.e. “The Flashlight”), erection rings (AKA cock rings), prostate stimulators, anal toys, and even dildos. You can also make your own toys such as cutting a hole in a stuffed animal and thrusting into that, or into a pillow or even making your own “flashlight”-which I will explain how to make in an upcoming post!!! Be sure to check it out! (:

**If you guys have any other questions related to masturbation that I didn’t cover here, such as picking out toys or tips and tricks, PLEASE send me a question and I’ll be happy to help you out. I can definitely point you in the right direction if you’re looking for a toy or give you some techniques for new masturbation experiences.